i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
