Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Damn victory sex feels great
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