May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
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