if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Bring me that man meat
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
jump out the window naked night went bad
Randomize
