We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize
