I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize
