when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
I'm always down for nudity.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
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