How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
