so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
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