I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
This baby is an asshole
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize