I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Randomize
