Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
