Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize
