one word: firstdatebathroomanal
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
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