He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
organizing the empties. That sober.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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