dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Randomize
