forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
The adults are the big ones right?
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
