They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Randomize
