There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Randomize
