Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
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