Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I have demons in me.
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize
