I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
