The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
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