just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
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