For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
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