I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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