Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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