She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
Randomize