its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
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