i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
