just tell him i said nine months
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
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