The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize