my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Randomize
