you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
Randomize
