If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
Randomize
