hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Randomize
