we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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