Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
Randomize
