i don't like sucking hair
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Randomize