How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
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