the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
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We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
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He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
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