he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
