I think i peed on brittanys purse
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Randomize
