She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Randomize
