there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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