life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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