hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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