But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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