doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize
