R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Randomize
